


Pravokutnik

by ApolloBlackwood



Category: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
Genre: (y'know how Satan was born), A lot of them - Freeform, Angst, Blood, Character Death, Educating Satan, Gen, Great Celestial War, Headcanon, Lack of Communication, Lesson 20 (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!) Spoilers, Mental Anguish, Mentions of Past/Assumed Violence, Minor Violence, Pain, Satan's Childhood, Self-Harm, Self-Loathing, Self-blaming, Serious Injuries, This is heavy but also it's coming to terms with certain issues, Trauma
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-18 20:06:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29495517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ApolloBlackwood/pseuds/ApolloBlackwood
Summary: Nobody had said it would be easy on the losing side. Lucifer had never expected it to be this hard though. Not that his expectations ever held true before.The Great Celestial War that had raged between the rebels and God had claimed many victims and the fewest were through death. Awakening to their sin aspects in Devildom, the six brothers (former angels, now demons) had to find ways to control their new selves.However, they were not alone.A seventh brother - the youngest but ranked fourth among them - probably suffered the most. And he, too, needed to learn control.But time was stacked against them - because should they fail to control their (self-)destructive urges, Barbatos would make sure that they won't pose a threat to the Devildom.- or: I wanted to write about Satan's growth (childhood if you want) after his birth, but surprisingly (or not) there's a lot of unresolved trauma stored in the demon brothers.
Relationships: Diavolo & Lucifer (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!), Lucifer & Satan (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!), Other Relationship Tags to Be Added
Comments: 2
Kudos: 24





	Pravokutnik

**Author's Note:**

> This is set years if not centuries before the exchange program.
> 
> Pravokutnik (trust me with my title selection haha, this one's on Ana) deals with some heavy topics. Like, if you read HSH - En Coeur, then you might've noticed one thing or two about my view on Devildom. I simply like working with angst.

Technically, Lucifer knew about the nature of demons. He knew that they were vile and treacherous beings without any mercy for other races or in fact, each other and he knew that their brutality begot murder, cruelty and insanity.

But during the Great Celestial War Lucifer came to ask himself if there was a great difference between angels and demons after all. There was neither grace nor mercy in the way they slaughtered one another – rebels against God’s forces –, and none of God’s teachings held true for both sides as the fight dragged on.

Someone had once said that falling from great heights would be peaceful. The howling wind rushing past your ears would block out any sound, your thoughts and heartbeat would be drowned out by the surrounding harmony and an endless sky would be the only sight left before an extremely painful but short ending …

… but it was a lie. All of it was a lie.

Lucifer couldn’t see much while falling because of tears and blood blurring his surroundings and he couldn’t breathe in panic because his wings had started giving out on him – it was impossible to move them, he couldn’t feel them anymore, his entire body was aching from injuries. But some moments, he was thinking clearly enough to reach out and protectively close his arms around the angel falling like stone with him. He tried screaming her name but cruel wind tore away the sounds from his lips like an avid thief, scattering them to heaven unheard.

Some moments, he thought about his brothers still fighting on somewhere in heavens above him and felt a new raging sensation, felt the despair of knowing that he wouldn’t be there to help them complete their quest for rebellion and now revenge. Felt how he had failed his brothers when he had forced them into this mess due to his arbitrary pride.

What was the prize to pay?

Someone had once said that hope never died. Lucifer couldn’t stop the force of falling from heaven with his broken wings when they were close to the ground. The impact when he landed on the somehwat solid surface was terrifying, deforming the sand-like earth underneath his body into a crater with ear-shattering sound. It added to the hurt Lucifer was suffering already and filled the air with clouds of sand that made breathing impossible. Time seemed to come to a cruel standstill.

“Lilith.” Lucifer coughed from his words. He moved the frail unmoving body in his arms with the rest of strength he had left and turned her in his arms so that he could see her face. Tears and drops of blood fell from his face onto her ashen cheeks. He choked on his words. “Lilith, please.”

Lucifer's voice was barely audible, not even a whisper anymore as he was threatened to be overwhelmed by his emotions. There was already too much blood on his hands, too much guilt to shoulder and too much weight for him to carry. He couldn’t lose the last of his family.

Not her too.

“Lilith, can you hear me?” He grabbed her hand with trembling, shaking hands, lifted it to his face and pressed her palm against his cheek, trying to ignore how cold she felt under his touch. “Lilith, it's me, Lucifer. Lilith ...”

She was still breathing, her chest barely moved under her pained rattling breaths.

“Lucifer.”

They were suddenly there, midst the clouds of settling dust, the demon prince and his butler, grave expressions on their faces but emotionally not moved in the slightest. Lucifer lifted his head to look up to them and pressed Lilith protectively against his chest, aware that he was in no condition to fight back should the demons decide to attack him. His end was near too. It was only a matter of time.

“Diavolo.” Thousand thoughts shot through Lucifer’s mind, reminding him who this demon was and what he could do. Rumors, nothing confirmed even though they had met in heaven before, but his mind stuck with the “what he could do”.

“Help her”, Lucifer heard himself begging with breaking voice, unable to let go off his sister, clinging to her while he begged: “Please help Lilith. I would … I would do anything …”

Those lightly yellow eyes, like suns in never ending darkness burning into his soul when Diavolo said there was no help for Lilith anymore.

That singular moment, when Lucifer overcame his pride and sold his soul to a demon in order to save the only family that he was still able still save.

The newly arising pain that devoured him wholly when Lilith disappeared in his arms to be reborn in a different realm, forever gone and with erased memories. She wouldn't even remember this one last sacrifice for her sake.

It was for the better. She was somewhere where Lucifer wouldn’t be able to lead her to her ruin anymore. It was for the better, Lucifer kept silently praying to himself. It still felt like a lie.

A gloved hand on his shoulder made him tense up.

“You are not alone anymore.” Barbatos had an even way of talking, his emotions not evident from the tone of his voice. “The young lord will take good care of you. Return to the demon lord’s castle once you’re ready.”

But Lucifer wasn’t ready. No, he didn’t plan on running from his responsibilities in any way because he meant to carry out the contract he had made Diavolo in all left-over pride, completely disregarding the fact that he had sold his body and soul and couldn’t go back even if he wanted to. Obviously, even if he had thought about it, there was no way of telling what the consequences of betrayal could be, but Lucifer made a self-promise that he had deserved this course of action. A repayment for his sins. A repayment for his mistakes.

It was for the better.

There was just one thing pestering him as he sat in the crater that his impact on the ground of this demon realm had caused, an admonishing reminder of his mistakes that suddenly made Lucifer’s existence feel unbearable to himself until he felt extremely disgusted: six wings on his back – once beautiful but now broken and nevertheless taking up space.

_Useless._

There was little way of telling which was the greater pain: the mental torment ever since the beginning of the war, the raging disgust he felt for himself, the physical injuries from the fight and fall or the fresh cuts that Lucifer dealt against himself when he started hacking blindly at the roots of his wings in an unknown kind of new rage. A burning mad rage against himself, against the rebellion, against angels, against his wings, his uselessness, the failure, his brothers and brethren, …

And so, Lucifer mixed his and foreign blood, some of it by angels he didn’t even know the names of, with even more blood under pained and angry screams and made black feathers fly where the ground was deformed underneath his body, hacked at wings even though every cut hurt –

A small hand closed around his wrist and stopped him from continuing. Red bloodied eyes met green glowing ones and held intense eye contact. Trembling - confused - Lucifer tried to free himself from the hard grip he was being held with, but he was too weak to resist even a demon _child_.

“Let go of me.”

The child didn’t move. Its eyes kept staring at Lucifer’s without blinking and Lucifer was the first to break eye contact, letting his tense shoulders sink down, defeated. He almost choked on his words when he added: “Please let go of me.”

Losing was something of a habit now.  
  


* * *

  
The time that followed was a little more than a blur in Lucifer’s mind. Naturally he followed the instructions that he had been given by Barbatos and headed toward the demon lord’s castle as requested as soon as he woke up from a deep sleep that he couldn’t pinpoint the length of. Devildom was perpetually dark and no sun would breach this darkness to help Lucifer cling to a sense of normality.

Normality was shattered beyond recognition.

Seeing his brothers alive and well in the demon lord’s castle despite his initial worries should’ve been a relief. Saying a simple “I am sorry” when they spotted each other in this entrance hall, beaten and defeated and covered in injuries, still felt like another slap across the face because it did not come close to what Lucifer was feeling and the words felt foreign on his lips, too bitter and untrue. Receiving guarded, disappointed and even hateful looks from every single one of them in response hurt the most.

“Aren’t you full of yourself, Lucifer”, the youngest spoke up, separated himself from the crowd with a step forward. Honestly, Belphegor sounded as if he had cried. Maybe he had. But it never came to a falling-out between the brothers and they never got to talk about what had happened because that moment Diavolo and Barbatos interrupted the reunion by joining them and effectively drowning out the beginning of confrontation.

"I see that you have finally gathered! Welcome to the Devildom, Avatars of Sin." Diavolo had been holding the child that Lucifer had seen before on his arm in what had seemed like a loose embrace (and it had violently tried to free itself to no avail), but now he let go to extend his arms to both sides. The child immediately ran toward the castle's exit but came to a halt midway when it realized that Lucifer was in the way. To Lucifer's surprise, the child cowered down and with hateful gaze started ... hissing like a wild animal at him.

Barbatos ignored the unusual behavior (or maybe this was usual?).

"It will take some time to get accustomed to the change but don't fret. I have prepared your accommodations before you will inevitably be able to occupy the R.A.D.’s student council rooms in the House of Lamentation. That is, when you have learned to control the sins you will be assigned to in due time of your stay.”

Needless to say that little explanation followed these ominous words because “time would tell”, as Barbatos worded it. At Lucifer’s direct question who that child cowering between them on the floor was (it stared at him as if there was nothing worse than Lucifer in this realm), Diavolo simply asked back with a smile: “Who do you think he is?” and avoided the topic thereupon. Maybe one of the rumors was true in the end and demons really didn't like answering questions.

But time did tell.

Lucifer soon learned that even though Barbatos had been serving Diavolo for as long as he could think, Lucifer had still become something of Diavolo’s right hand man (though he wondered if that was the best description of his position). Without question, he was executing Diavolo's orders, which were never directly given but once one had sold his soul, he would understand the implications behind words without that the master had to voice them. Most of the work was of theoretical nature – paperwork, filling out forms, filing decisions that concerned highly important matters (Lucifer learned not to ask why Diavolo entrusted these to a newcomer like him but accept it silently).

Meanwhile the child – a wild raging creature by any means – was soon called Satan. Satan because he was a little devil: mischievous, cunning, extremely hateful and full of destructive energy. It would’ve been kind to say that he was the worst problem Lucifer had to deal with in this initial phase. However, one should learn to recognize a blatant lie when they saw it.

Time would tell, Barbatos had said. He of all demons had to know.

And time did tell.

Time assigned each of the brothers, who were called Avatars of Sin beforehand in gifted foresight, a sinful core element in theory to describe the essence of their character: pride, greed, envy, wrath, lust, gluttony and sloth. And when they awakened to their sin … it drove them crazy, some more and some less.

The youngest, who was ranked fourth among them in terms of strength despite his age, had the most to learn in this initial period to not get erased immediately by Barbatos for his destructive misbehavior. And it wasn’t just up to his creator to teach him those lessons in a contest against time.

In fact, a lot of lessons Satan might’ve taught himself.


End file.
